oh dear me. no howard. not what you're thinking. im just a lil over loaded.... man.. i've been meaning to update for a couple days.. and i never did it. why? just cuz. haha.
 
is missing the past a good thing because you remember the happy times? or is it just bad, because you cant live in the past? honestly, i dont know what my life would be like without my tai poi. shes always been there. i have pictures from my first christmas, and its the 4 generations...together... fastforward some years... shes now 92.. and still going... i wish i could say shes going strong.. but i cant. and i guess knowing that just kinda kills a part of me. shes a lot happier now then she was before.. dont get me wrong. shes always been a happy person.. she never yelled... and i never got in trouble with her... actually i dun think anyones ever gotten in trouble with her... like amongst me and the cousins... she's always been the one IN trouble with us! i mean who runs in a mall? my tai poi.  and who does she take with her when she does it? us. *sigh* i miss those days.. those days of grammie, tai poi and us running in the malls, with my mommy going "DONT RUN!!" haha.. at least shes happy now, even tho shes being quite forgetful... not a worry in the world, and shes always smiling and laughing.. shes just so happy. oh how i'd give up years for her. i honestly would. i cant imagine living without her there.  every unexpected urgent phone call, i worry... i know shes gonna leave us one day, and that shes gonna go and be with my daddy in heaven, and one day im going too, but for now? it breaks my heart to just even think that shes gonna hafta leave this world. and i fear that the day is approaching. i dont know when, but i DO know that every day, im thankful that its not her time to go home yet.. and shes still here with us, even tho she doenst live with me.

oks. next question. who wants to go dress shopping FOR me? cuz knowing me, and the way i dress for formal stuff... (if you dunno.. ask sarah.. oh dear.. she'll give you a long and detailed description which basically amounts to i dont "dress up" unless i really gotta, and even then, its when ppl make me that i do 0.o) so basically.. i hate dress shopping. things i like? (scary thought eh? me? liking a dress?? woa.. ) neways, dresses i like? NEVER in my size.. and things that totally clash with me, as far as skin tone and such (for more info on that, see my grammie) they fit me.. size wise... *sigh* so i blaze malls  (notice the "s" on malls) and i have the worlds hardest time finding one.. now ayesha's party? (im soo excited and happy for her!!!!)  i have like from whenever malls open, til like 4.30 to get something... thats really really REALLY tight... honestly.... hmm... maybe i'll go to dynamite, and they'll still have that dress.. hmm.. cant go wrong.. sarah approved it..if you dunno which one i mean.. then thats just TOO bad. ha. thats what you get for NOT going shopping for me. unless you're going to ayesha's thing.. then you'll see it (duh!)  haha. honestly. i dun see what this fuss is about getting all dressed up and "ppppprrreeeeetttttyyy..... like prom" according to ayesha.. *sigh* its her day.. so whatever she wants.
 
hmm.. what else to say? im being laid off for 2 weeks. but thats not new.. and its not exciting.. hmm. oh yeah! who knew that the picture thingers for CHILDRENs sunday school would be so hard? HONESTLY. it wasnt bad.. then i started prep for next sunday... oh dear.. oh dear me. haha.. *sigh* time to do more cutting.. if i EVER find my sissors.. *sigh*